The Lost Get Found

Dear Diary,

Uh, if you know me, you know I've been faced with some choices for the talent show (will it ever end?).

So do you remember when I once said I sorta wanted to be with the Dancing Divas? I still do, but my answer was always that I could never betray W like that, even while feeling left out with the whole tricycle and then the unicycle (long story).

Yesterday I learned that I could be in two groups!! I thought. "awesome! I can finally fulfill my wish!"

Uh, no.

Now I'm just dead lost.

First of all, not all of the Dancing Divas want me in their group. I'm not calling any names, you know who you are.

Secondly, W won't let me, which just brings me to tears.

Look, W. I know you're reading this and I need you to hear me.

Nel told me everything you said and you guys were both being cold. I can't blame you though, things have always been heated. Why didn't you just talk to me? You upset me more then anything. What happened to being able to tell each other things with no regret?

I told you who I liked because I trusted you; I stopped mocking you of Dude; I left you and Kat alone for once.

We didn't talk today at all besides English where we're forced to sit next to each other. Even then they weren't exactly "nice" words. What happened to the thousands of words every day? Positive and encouraging?

Look, here's the truth: I can't be the real me with Repeat. I mean, I'm not saying I don't want to be in Repeat, just hear me out. I love being in Repeat, whether excluded or not. Repeat is one of the only things holding is together.

Truth be told, if I can't be myself, I'm not happy. I need to be free to be me. Today in Art I based my picture on a Pokémon and I couldn't be anymore happier. Happiness isn't everything, but it's nice to have a nice vibe goin' on.

I'm not the only one hurting, either. Someone I know misses her bestie Kat after your fellow flutist doesn't seem to pay much attention to her.

Our song says who says your not the only one who's hurting, and you can't doubt it because no one knows it better than you and I. I know for a fact you're hurting just as much as I am. We need to fix this, and NOT through emails.

You are the best friend who had stayed with me since kindergarden, the girl who had always been 30 seconds away. The one I would get in trouble talking to during class last year.

I wish I could have just one more moment of just us!!!

I'm lost... Then Britt Nicole reminded me how I can be found through.

The lyrics in her song tell everyone how all of us hit potholes in the road. If we have a strong faith in God alone, we will be found by Him. Not only that, but He'll even give us a free tire change, a new chance!!

I need to do both Repeat AND the Dancing Divas.

A special Bible teacher once told me that I made a commitment to Repeat. And I'm not breaking it... Even if I was kicked out already...

She also told me that if it's my choice and if I really want to I could join the Divas.

Maybe because I was never lost, but God was found.

I'm a secret seeker... ; ))

Love y'all and wish me luck!!

Yours Through Everything,

The Secret Seeker <3

8-D