Trying Something New

Dear Diary,

Hi everyone...

So my family forced me into going to this small, new church which is really different from the big Christ Church.

The church is called Creekside Church. And tomorrow my dad is forcing me into going to my own service instead of going with them.

I hate it.

I make up excuses like, "oh, I understood it," and that I like listening to the worship music and what not.

I mean, the music part is true, but honestly I hate going to my own service!! I know D is gonna be there, but I guess I forgot to mention she's a year younger in fifth grade. AND, yes, there's an and, it's not just sixth grade, but the whole MIDDLE SCHOOL.

If you know me, you knew I was scared to death of middle school. Was still am, and always will be.

I just hate to be judged, you know? I never liked going because I was so sick of people forgetting my name, and I was invisible, and on and on and on.

Plus, the teachers are all up in your face and get all personal and stuff. I get tears every time because it seems no one has ever gone through what I've done.

I know I believe in God, I have a newfound strong faith, too, but this is just one of the things I can't handle doing.

Sure, I complain I'm invisible, but I sorta LIKE it like that.

This feels exactly like trying new food, doing new sports, overcoming fears, except a million timed worse.

I still gotta choreograph a dance, so I gotta go.

Email me advice and pray for me...

I really need it this time...

Luv y'all,

*•The Fearful One•*